It's not easy to shoot yourself in the foot while it's in your mouth.

Donut holes of idiocy

Do, or do not. There is no try.

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a mechanic.

Life. Lick it.

Make a fire for a man, he'll be warm for the rest of the night. Set a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life!

If we could see ourselves as others see us, we would vanish on the spot.

...as confused as a termite in a yo-yo

I-You, I-It (derivative of I-Thou, I-It)

What other people think of me is none of my business.
And:
What I think of other people is none of their business.